Bamsipas!

Happy Birthday Sissy!

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 04:20:00 +0000

I was going write something clever for this blog, similar to something you would see on a Hallmark card

But all I could think of writing were cheesy sayings that rhymed

If you were here a couple weekends ago, when Katie stayed the night, and you shared the brief moments of reading through my old adolescent journals that had nothing but love poems to the boys I thought I loved... you would be glad that I didn't make up any ridiculous poems to attach to thisSo instead I am going to post a few pictures of you

that have people in them that love you

And memories that you will never forget

With family that makes you laugh

and a bratty sister that can never resist throwing in pictures like this even though I know you will hate me for it. You are the one that took it though.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Updates on my studious life

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 03:33:00 +0000

I had to run to my bus stop this morning. It was rather embarrassing, yet I totally deserved it with my prideful thoughts. Usually I walk out my door around 6:10-6:15AM and have a little time to spare upon arriving at the bus-stop. Today, I left my house at 6:19 AM. I should have started running immediately after getting to the street, but was too prideful to do so when two girls came walking onto the same sidewalk with their dog. I didn't want them to see that I was obviously late, when they would observe my head bobbing and unbalanced bag wavering behind me on my back. Instead, I chose to walk briskly. I rounded the corner and what did I see? The bus making it's turn onto the street nearing quickly where I needed to be standing. I bolted as soon as I saw it while praying in my head that he would either 1) drive by me and not see my pathetic self running with great amazon-like effort and thinking to himself "sucka, she should have been there on-time! Maybe next time!" or 2) see my sad, out of shape body running towards him in hopes to find a merciful bus driver await my presence on the bus.

He waited! So did everyone else on the bus. All were staring at me when I boarded and I am sure that they all watched me run a block and a half to join on. I thanked the bus driver for waiting when I arrived... and also when I got off at the U. Maybe I will send in a compliment to UTA regarding this specific driver and acknowledge his compassion for the young straggler Thursday morning...

On another note:

1) School is kicking my trash. I am grateful it is. It is nice to have something to do with my brain outside of work to serve as a distraction from the incessant complaining thoughts that occupy my mind of how terrible my job is when I come home.

2) I am seriously contemplating the philosophies of Henry Thoreau and thinking that his way of life might be really good for me. Some of his theories match my own and I wonder what it would be like to live almost with nothing, work 6 weeks out of the year, and devote the rest of my time to study to avoid the evil that the commercial world inevitably offers.

3) Frugality is not always bad. I have been cooking more which has been nice. I love cooking and with my limited funding I have been forced to make a lot of things from scratch. The highlight of this week's cooking has been Extra Hot Buffalo Wing sauce. Okay, so it has been the high light for the past two weeks, but none the less it is fantastic! I can't even remember the last time I ate out.

I started riding the bus (obviously as stated above), since I get a free bus pass for being a student, and have loved ALMOST every minute of it. I get time to brush up on my studies on my way to school. I get to read the paper on the way home. I enjoy the scenery, including the cute hairy man that gets on the bus with me at the U and gets off somewhere in Sugarhouse.

Freeway drivers definitely hate me. On my drive to work, since that is the only time I ever drive my car, I stay in the right lane and never go over 55 MPH. Yes, the speed limit is 65 MPH. I am a jerk, but also just trying to conserve my gas. Vehicles always get better gas mileage when driving between 55-60 MPH, therefore I have fewer fill-ups. I really don't mind semi's passing me anymore, or getting stuck behind the really slow Uhaul truck drivers. In fact, I get excited when I am able to get behind them because they always go slower than the speed limit.

Despite my life-long worries, things are really great right now...

Reflection

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 01:17:00 +0000

I have been contemplating writing this blog or not, but I figured what the heck?

I love my life.

I have to keep reminding myself of that. I had to tell a few people at work today to not let me say anything like "I hate my life" or "kill me now" because in all reality, I have a fantastic life. I just have a crazy job that causes a lot of my emotional strife that unfortunately carries into my personal life. Despite the despair, heartache, frustrations, and incessant cussing going through my head all day while in my office, I still think that my current place of employment is one of the best opportunities I have had. It definitely is teaching me life lessons and what not to do when I have my own practice. Believe it or not, it is ALSO teaching me a few things that I should do too and who the real troopers are left in this world.

I love my family.

I don't have to remind myself of that because I am constantly being shown tender mercies through them. I have great parents and step-parents that treat me like I am the best thing that ever happened to them. I am still not sure as to why that is being that I am the biggest brat in the world. You can even ask my best friend that. She will agree. A few months ago, my step-dad, told my mom that he wanted to help pay for my tuition and books in hopes for me to get my education. My dad also agreed to help. Today, I found an abundance of money sitting in my bank account. Of course it will be gone within 24 hours to pay for my smarts, but to know that they would be willing to help me invest in my future is remarkable. I hope that I can pay them back every penny and more some day.

I love my friends.

For the past week I have gotten numerous texts and calls to make sure I was okay. I had a very rough week and with their love and support I am able to find myself sitting at my kitchen table, eating boneless buffalo wings (ok so it is really popcorn chicken with extra hot buffalo sauce smothered all over), with a dry eye, writing this blog with nothing but peaceful thoughts. Thank you my lovelies for asking me how I was doing and telling me to keep looking up.

Time to hit the books!

A Few New Insights

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 16:51:00 +0000

1) Watching an 18 year old girl and and a 25 year old boy flirt annoyingly while sitting in the front row (directly in front of me) at 7:21 AM is very IRRITATING!

2) Public transportation is a whole new world. You see/hear interesting people, view all the places you pass that you are unable to notice when driving a car, and realize that even bus drivers can have really bad road rage.

3) I really want to date a black man. They are ridiculously attractive.

4) I have no idea what the heck is going on in my philosophy class... help!

The Joys of College Life!

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 02:28:00 +0000

Today was the third day of school. I had my computer lab first thing this morning in a different building that I had never been in. I was already running late because I'm not used to my butt-crack of dawn schedule therefore getting out my front door was a bit of a challenge. More like, getting out of my bed was more of the challenge. I got to school, after watching the roads closely for cops and a speedometer rise and fall in between my freeway weaving, in a hurry to find this unknown class room. Upon my arrival to the parking lot I realized my class had already started.

I walked as fast as I could without running towards the direction I thought my class was though I really had no earthly idea. I was hoping to find those handy-dandy orientation helpers at their table with maps all ready to hand to the poor lost losery freshman such as my self. I quickly found a table of freshly printed maps along with a bright-eyed sophomore, after circling a few buildings trying to find it on my own, ready and willing to give me direction as to where my class was. She pointed me towards the building with the black windows and I went on my way. I walked to the first door I saw and of course it was locked. I found the next set of doors at the top of a brutal stair case that I hurriedly tried to walk up. I found my way inside only to realize I had another 4 flights of stairs to walk up being that my class is on the very top floor.

I reach the top and find my classroom a little way down the hall. I walk in the only available door and see 80 pairs of eyes all glancing at the lost girl walking into the classroom twenty five minutes late. Ignoring their stares, I try to find a seat fast in hopes to get the judgmental eyes out of my general direction. It was difficult to find a seat but as I neared the back, low and behold, I spotted one at the very end of the row. Of course, that required me to climb over 12 adults and block the view of twelve more behind me. Oops!

I sat down, looked around, and came to the conclusion that I am one out of six females in the entire class of 80 something people. This is going to be my favorite class by far!

Monday Morning

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 14:48:00 +0000

It is Monday morning and I am sitting here in my office all alone contemplating the sadness of what has become of my current situation. I miss my co-worker, Tyniece. I miss the fun atmosphere. I miss the drive in the air. Although, it is coming to an end, and I have other opportunities being placed before me, I can't help but be a little sad.

All weekend I have been feeling like it is the end of my life. A lot of circumstances have or already ended. For example, I was released from my calling, my housing contract is up, I am leaving my best friend, I will no longer have a job, my car is paid for as of this month, my Gold's Gym membership is up, my friend's are moving out of the ward, my computer broke, and many other events are over. I have been packing my stuff in boxes all weekend getting ready to move while thinking about my current state.

BUT THINGS ARE LOOKING UP! I signed a lease with my good friend, Becca Bates, for a really cute 2 bedroom apartment in Midvale. It has a wood burning fireplace, a great student ward, and I get the master bedroom! She gets the garage. I bought a laptop and am anxiously awaiting it's arrival to my front door. My step-dad added me to his health insurance since I am only 23, a full time student, and his favorite step-daughter. My parents have both offered to help me out with tuition, books, and some of my living expenses until I can get a job. I signed up for a couple really cool classes that I am excited about. I might buy a kingsize bed for my new apartment mainly because I want friends and family to visit a lot. I cleaned out my closet and a few other random places and have 2 1/2 large boxes ready for the DI. I got rid of more stuff that I had since sophomore year in high school. Becca and I picked out the ward we will be attending. It's super fun with lots of attractive men. Last but not least, I am starting over with a clean slate. I am changing everything about my atmosphere and though I am a little frightened, I am so excited!

It is going to be FANTASTIC!

Not Enough

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 04:32:00 +0000

I couldn't get it loud enough and definitely not long enough!

I popped a fantastic CD in my player on my way home from work tonight and couldn't seem to get it to play loud enough. Even though it was blaring in my ears and vibrations radiating off my body, it just was not loud enough nor was the song long enough. I kept turning it up and screaming at the top of my lungs to the words that I knew, but still it was not satisfying my craving. I wanted to feel the whole experience to be so much deeper. I was so obsessed with the replay of my selection of songs, that I purposely drove to a further Wendy's to pick up dinner in hopes to hear them a few more times before arriving home.

Man, I love music!

Doomed

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 15:45:00 +0000

I was going over my budget last night before going to bed. Word to the wise, never do that before falling upon your nightly slumber. Thoughts of how to finance the next year of my life ran continuously through my mind as I tossed and turned. How do students live? I can barely live on what I make without all the school expenses. I finally fell asleep after trying to make myself sleepy by reading my book The Traveler's Wife. I was somewhat unsuccessful due to the material that I was anxiously fantasizing in my head. At least I had some sort of distraction from my financial worries.

This morning I woke up early, got ready for work, and drove to work. The entire way to American Fork I couldn't push the thought out of my mind that I HAD to have the Twilight soundtrack. Random huh? What did I do? I stopped at the Wal-mart close to my work, picked up the CD, and drove the next 8 minutes in pure bliss as I pictured Edward's face...

I'm doomed for the rest of my educational experience if I am going to impulse buy to ease my financial frustrations.

Um Yeah

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 07:00:00 +0000

Sometimes I forget that I am supposed to be a mature adult and have conversations like these...

*Ring Ring
Nick: Thank you for calling Discount Tire Company, this is Nick how can I help you?
Me: Hi Nick, this is Amber Shimp and I was just in your store getting a tire replaced. Can I talk to Greg, the man who helped me?
Nick: He is actually with a customer right now.
Me: Oh (surprised face at this point). Well, can I ask you a question?
Nick: Sure
Me: Is he single?
Nick: (chuckle) Um, he actually just got engaged (chuckle)
Me: (panicking) ok thanks BYE
*Click

Disaster Dream

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 14:59:00 +0000

I had a wedding dream last night. It was a disaster! I didn't actually see the wedding ceremony, and I'm not sure if we were even married at this point, but we all went to a church building for the reception. Apparently, someone else was holding their reception at the same cultural hall at the same time as us. I remember walking around in a long shirt that I was using as a dress. The entire length of my legs were being exposed and I kept pulling it over my rump to make sure at least that was covered. I felt so immodest being in an LDS church building wearing this, but none-the-less I continued to prance around trying to figure out what was going on. The other reception was trying to set up at the same time and were hogging the room. I tried dividing it up with the bendable walls in between, but they got mad at me because they wanted the entire cultural hall. On top of that, church was being held too and the Gospel Doctrine class was mad because they wanted their room for class.I was extremely frustrated. No one seemed to care that I was having a wedding. They were too concerned with the other reception and the Gospel Doctrine class. I kept telling my family that we were running out of time and that the guests would be showing up soon. They didn't seem to care, but instead continued to stand around chatting. I was having a major freak out feeling like if I wanted it done I would have to take care of it myself.

At some point during my run-around, I grabbed one of the bridesmaids dresses, from the other wedding who I realize was one of my friend's from my home ward in Washington, and put it on in hopes to cover up my scandalous attire. It didn't fit because it was for someone really skinny, but I zipped it up as much as possible to use as coverage from the hips down. It was really long and I felt like a princess despite how it did not fit my upper body. I felt bad for the bridesmaid that would eventually come looking for it because it would have been previously worn and sweaty from my run-around. It was a really weird dress and all the decorations she was using were from another time period. There were some sort of sea animal decorations all over the place with a lot of colors. She had really gone off the deep end to have all these odd objects sporadically placed. At least she was more prepared than I seemed to be at the time though.

I found the other bride, my friend, in a room getting ready. She had taken up all of the other rooms in the building for her private party dinners. I was really angry and couldn't believe that no one was helping to get mine ready AND that she was hogging every inch of space in the building. I went back to the cultural hall and sat on my knees as someone made some sort of speech from my friend's wedding. I remember looking over at my husband (or future because I still am unsure if we were even married yet) and thinking that he was a stranger to me. He wasn't around helping me in my chaotic despair, but rather looking good from across the room talking to all of his relatives. I remember thinking "why are we even getting married, I don't even know him well enough. How is the wedding night going to work if I'm not even comfortable enough to tell him to help me get this reception working." It just felt like there were too many empty spaces in my head of him.

I woke up and had the sickest feeling about the whole dream. It is a bride's worst nightmare to not have anything prepared, including the reception hall, and an even worse nightmare to look over at your husband and realize you do not know him at all...

My Week of Excitement

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 21:30:00 +0000

1) I finished the 4th book of the Twilight series. Dang, I wish I were a vampire and met Edward first!

2) I looked at an apartment in Sugar House a couple nights ago which made me SUPER excited for the future changes that are rapidly approaching.

3) My mom called to tell me that my step-dad wants to a) pay 1/3 of my tuition and books b) add me to his health insurance (which happens to be really good) and c) try and convince me to come home for a visit. I'm contemplating taking a week off before school and traveling my way through the NW and back.

4) My dad told me he is fixing a motorcycle for me.

5) I got "butt" called three times by the same person.

6) The company I work for was awarded a few projects. Prayers really do get answered.

7) My dad came into town and I'm meeting him in Southern Utah tonight for a camping trip.

8) Peanut Butter M&M's are soooooo good.

Grand

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 17:35:00 +0000

I feel light as a feather since I have made a change in my eating due to the Biggest Loser that me and my friends are currently engaged in (not all in the picture are playing). I forget how much control I possess when I let my emotional stance take over. I also forgot how competitive I can be. I do not think it is a bad thing to be this way. In fact, I look at it more as a gift from God simply because if people were not competitive in their daily lives, a lot would not have made it as far as they did in their life. Maybe that is how I will be with med school. Just a thought...

Twilight is still taking over my life. I started the second book last night and am really close to being half way done. I just know that Edward is going to come back. I keep trying to predict how it is going to happen. Is it lame that I have been giddy for the past 3 days because of the stupid books? I show all emotion when I read stuff like this; tears, laughter, sadness, joy. I feel like my heart is going to jump out of my chest most of the time. I cannot sleep because I stay up all night thinking about what I had just read and how certain things will play out. Its entirely possible that I might be day dreaming that it is me in Bella's place...but don't judge me for that statement. I haven't read a book for leisurely purposes in a long time which could be contributing to my obsessiveness. I like it a lot. It is a really nice feeling being that the last few months have been somewhat difficult to find joy in. I need to remember this for my future--getting lost in books to excite my life that is...

Today everyone is pissy in my office. Instead of being mad about it, I am sitting here anticipating my run in the rainy canyon this afternoon, my kickboxing class to follow, and then a quiet evening lying on my bed reading. Life is grand.

Fantastical

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 18:56:00 +0000

I made a mistake of watching Twilight for the first time on Saturday night with my roommate (also a die-hard fan) Somer, and my best friend who refuses to get lured into trends, Katie. I am not afraid to admit that it was an amazing experience in the regard that it fulfills my longing fantasy to be mysterious, and desperately loved by the opposite sex who desires to know every little thing about me. The movie doesn't actually portray the humor and depth of their actual relationship as the book, but it was still an excellent film.

After watching the film, I stole the book from Somer and have been reading it since. I only have a couple more chapters left and am dying to know what else happens that was left out of the movie. I have been thinking about the fantastical experience all day and wish that it was me who found Edward first. Of course, I sound cliche but as I read on I realized how much of a romantic I am. This is why I try not to read material like this becuase it only make me want to find Edward watching me sleep in my bedroom at night. Or even wish to find something similar to their story for myself. We all know that stuff like that doesn't really happen in real life nor even close; especially these days.

I still dream that I will find someone someday that has that kind of love for me as Edward does for Bella. Go ahead and say it, I'm ridiculous...

I am...

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 04:03:00 +0000

Doing the Biggest Loser with some friends and a few random people.

I'm going to kick their trash...

Downward Spiral

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 01:08:00 +0000

I just finished reading a blog that my lovely friend, Shara, wrote about her wedding pictures and photographer that took them. She inspired me to write this blog especially since I have been thinking about this a lot.

It seems people do not take pride in their work these days. By that, I simply mean that no one puts forth their best effort and stands by it in what they are performing. Lately, I have been dealing with correcting a lot of careless mistakes that some of the plumbers have made in the past year at my work place. It has cost us thousands of dollars and a few major headaches to improve the circumstances. If someone had just double checked this, or tightened it twice, made a follow up call, or put just a little more thought in it, things would have been okay. No one cares now. They only care about getting a paycheck, buying their $12.00+ meal, a pack of cigarettes, and other unnecessary items. It seems like the value of work is decreasing incredibly fast.

A couple mornings ago I was getting ready to go to the gym. I put a hair-tie in my hair to keep it back from my vigorous work out. As I was making the third loop (which I have done before with that same hair tie and it is brand new) I felt the snap and watched it fly across the bathroom. I couldn't help but think that situation is happening too often in my life. If it is not the hair-tie snapping, it is the bike pump lever breaking. Or the pool flotation having a hole in it before you take it out of the package. Everything is so cheaply made. Maybe that is a good thing because it keeps the economy on the up and up, but at the same time this is only another example of the value of work rapidly decreasing. Manufactures are using cheaper products to make their marketable items and do it in such a way that they do not last very long.

If only people realized the value of work and taking pride in what they do, I think we would see a major change in the attitude of the world. I sound like Miss America giving her statement on how to make the world a better place by writing this. It just makes me a little sad that people living on the earth today are going in a downward spiral in their morale.

Randomness

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 03:26:00 +0000

I love dried bananas and think I will dehydrate my own this summer.
I wore my University of Utah shirt to work yesterday. Because my future absence is still on the down low to my fellow co-workers, when someone asked me why I was a Ute fan I simply replied "Now that I have dark hair I have come to realize that I look better wearing red than blue." Most of the guys just roll theirs eyes and make a sarcastic comment like "That's how I choose mine too" as they walk away chuckling. Ha!

I exercised/worked out for 3 hours straight today and loved every minute of it.

Mr. Untouchable called me to chat this afternoon. When we were talking he said to me "tell me that you think of me other than when we on the phone". I told him I did but he was off limits to me. Then he went on to give me the "I'm so surprised you are single" and "all the guys around here are pansys". You know, the talk that your grandmother or girlfriends give you...

I'm still dedicated more than ever to go to school and forget about finding a husband.

My best friend has a potential lover and refuses tell me anything about it. How am I supposed to live my life vicariously though someone when she won't talk about it? (love you still)

My co-worker, Tyniece, plans her breaks around mine so we can go outside together. I pull weeds in the yard while she has a smoke.

Guess Who?

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 14:26:00 +0000

I showed this picture to two of my coworkers to see if they could guess which one was me. Both of them stared at it for at least 3 minutes trying to figure out which one of the 8th grade graduates was me...

Dare to take a guess?

Mr Untouchable

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 21:57:00 +0000

called this afternoon to tell me there was no mail. He also told me he called me over the weekend to see if I wanted to go out but I did not answer. Crap...

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 18:03:00 +0000

I dreamed that I lived in a basement with a huge bedroom. In fact, the bedroom could have been like a family room that I was using. There were tons of boxes everywhere and my bathroom was hidden through a small door in the closet. It was kind of neat because it was like a secret door to get inside. The room was very dark and I may have been scantily dressed walking through it a couple times. What do you think that means?

My boss told me today that he was going to make me a task list of a few things he needs me to do. Is it bad that I didn't like that? I do not enjoy being told what to do. Or maybe it was the way he said it which made me feel like I wasn't getting stuff done. Either way, I was offended and I need to stop feeling that way since he is my employer.

I had a pleasant conversation last night with someone I haven't talked to in a while. Although it was over text, a simple phrase he stated gave me warm fuzzies and brought a smile to my face.

Yesterday

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 04:26:00 +0000

Mr Untouchable called in the late afternoon. I did not answer.

Attitude Adjustment

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Sun, 31 May 2009 22:09:00 +0000

I really have been struggling with my attitude. I am not sure if it's because I could possibly be PMSing or if I have legit reasons to be somewhat angry at life. I hate that phrase "angry at life" but sometimes that is the best way to put it. A couple weeks ago I emailed 5 people, that know me best, this short paragraph...

"In Relief Society today we were talking about spiritual gifts when a thought came to my mind. I have had a hard year and have been a little lost lately. I really need a little uplift for life and thought what better way to do it than to ask the people closest to me to give me a little feedback. I do not want you to feel obligated to do this but if you have a few minutes in your day, can you email me back to tell me of a few of the strengths that you see I posses? I feel like I need to ask you since you are one that knows me best."

4 Responded...

Response 1:

"Hi Amber,

I just got home from another long day at work, read your email and here are a few things I thought of right off the top of my head. Of course there are more YOU are AWESOME!

1) Very independent,

2) very mature for your age

3) determined

4) self-reliant

5) have a lot of will power

6) can't be bossed around

7) doesn't follow the crowd

8) sticks to her guns

9) doesn't let other influence her decisions

10) follows her heart

11) spiritually mature

12) Friendly

13) Always willing to help someone

14) Unselfish

15) Caring

16) Concerned for others

17) loves her family

18) Self motivated

19) Serious but fun

20) Compassionate AND A

21) righteous daughter of God"

Response 2:

"I've been wanting to respond to this for a couple of days now. I got all of today's work done and decided to respond before I went home so you didn't have to wait any longer. It's not much, but I hope it helps!

Your most apparent strength is your confidence in your own opinions, decisions and ideas. When you have arrived at one of your own opinions, made a decision, or have an idea in your head, you do not deviate from that course. This is a strength in that, when you have chosen the correct path (as you often do!) you are not swayed by others.

You have an infectious cheerfulness. Your yellow car fits you so well. You are always so outwardly happy and encouraging. You smile and laugh often, which uplifts others, even if on the inside you are struggling or uncomfortable.

You are an incredibly hard worker. You see yourself with a responsibility and you work yourself to death! You put in lots of time at work, not because you love it so much, but because you feel a responsibility and you work hard to fulfill it. When you have a priority, you see that it is not neglected! Thus, you also seem to work hard on church callings!"

Response 3:

"Sorry It's taken me a while to get back on this! I was trying to think, and then I forgot!

I think one of your strengths is your confidence, or your "fake" confidence, as you call it. You just carry yourself well and you seem to be very confident and outgoing. You are also very friendly to everyone.

Another is you are very independent. You don't rely on anyone for anything. You like to take care of yourself.

I'll try to think of more good ones. You have many strengths. I'm just trying to think of some good ones."

Response 4:

"Dear Amber:

Sorry this took me so long to write. But there are lots to say!

First of all, your email came at a timely point. My friend Lindsey was here visiting this week and we were talking about people and I mentioned you...she was like, oh you still talk to her? (as in, we were friends a long time ago...you still kept track of that one?) and I was like, well of course. She's the best woman I know.

And THAT I mean in the most literal sense. You are seriously the best woman I know. And I know a lot of women :) And although most days I feel like you are perfect, logic tells me likewise..but still I know that you being the BEST woman means that you do the best in the most and the areas you aren't yet able are the ones that help balance you out.

You are incredibly generous. And I mean the sort of generous where you will help anyone out that you do or do not know....and if you don't, you feel bad for it later :) The Lord gave you a good heart, and you have done the best of anyone to keep it pure.

You are a wonderful listener, which makes you the best kind of friend. You listen, but acknowledge, and laugh or emote along. As a part of this you also offer great insight that is practical and caring. This results in the people you serve and befriend being able to build a strong trust in you.

Which reminds me, you are extremely trustworthy. I never had to worry about you saying the wrong thing, even though I am sure I embarrassed you a time or ten :)

You center your life around living Christ-like and being a good person. You have committed your life to the Lord and continuously follow through. This may be something that seems silly, but I am surrounded right now by people that have not been able to maintain that much tenacity through thick and thin...they seem to ease up right around the thin parts. But you, you carry on with life, seeking out the love of the Lord and the things that you can do.

Responsibility is your strength!!! At times when I just want to stop being responsible, I look at you and know that if Amber is doing it, then by george I ought to be.

Love. You sure do know how to love. You seek out the best in people, and not being ignorant of their weaknesses or less desirable behaviors, you treat them as if they are kings and queens.

Overall, I respect and admire you so much. Especially for putting up with me. You know me better probably than any roommate I have ever had, and yet you are the one that has always stayed by my side. I don't think we have ever been in a fight? I can't think of a time... this is amazing. Your patience is something I strive for. In every way of how you operate your life and how you commit yourself to your goals, you are the better and the best woman.

Chin up, buttercup. I don't feel like this list is complete. I hope you don't mind if I send more as I think of it.

Love you dearly, in every way"

I did not really want to post these because I feel like a few are not true. Or at least have these 4 individuals fooled of who I really am. Then I thought about it and figured that if some of the closest people to my heart would write such nice things about me, they must have seen that in me at some point regardless if I still possess those characteristics. I re-read them today in my moments of heartache and discouragement. It helped. Thank you, friends, for writing me back and telling me what you have experienced in your interactions/friendship with me. It means a lot to hear the qualities you perceive. It is easy to forget that we are great when there is a very strong force pulling against us. I will forever remember what you have written me and hope that I can someday lift you up when you need it.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Sat, 30 May 2009 03:04:00 +0000

being called honey by my potential lovers. I like being called babe, but it totally depends on how it is said. When it is condesending, please no thanks. I hate being called sweetie. That just makes me feel like a kid.

"the look" that screams "dang, what a sight for sore eyes. My day is so much brighter now" upon walking in the room when pleasantly surprising someone.

playing hard to get.

Today

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Sat, 30 May 2009 02:46:00 +0000

1) I cried on my way to work today due to a severe case of stress
2) Then prayed all morning that I would find money for payroll being that it is payday today
3) I called a couple contractors with my tail between my legs begging/demanding they pay up the money owed.
4) Then I fought with one of our company suppliers about something.
5) I stopped by the my old office to pick up our mail, see Mr. Untouchable (dang he is good looking and such a smooth talker), and visit with his mother.
6) Then I went to Salt Lake City to pick up a check from the contractor I so humbly begged money from.
7) I stopped at the U of U on my lunch break, since I was in the area, and bought two red shirts with the school's logo. I am obsessed! I'm really only trying to convince myself that it is the right thing for me to do. I have to go there every once in a while to remember what my goals are.
8) Mr. Untouchable called.
9) Then I returned to the office to find that one of my employees couldn't cash his check due to insufficient funds (it won't go through until midnight).
10) I came home to pick up Katiekins and headed to dinner.
11) I thought the day was never going to end.

Random Joys

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Fri, 29 May 2009 04:28:00 +0000

I am addicted to vitamins. Today I took my last pack and was expecting to have my replenishment this afternoon when I arrived home from work. When I realized they had not been placed on my front porch by Mr. Fed Ex, I hurriedly tried to find a package in my purses that I have neglected to clean out from prevous usage. I felt like a drug addict. I am sure that I looked like one too rummaging through everything quickly to find my pills that I have to take every day to function properly. Luckily I found some.

One of my co-workers (the one that I admire the most because he is my protector), mummbled something to his partner, who happened to be standing at my desk, when I got up to find documents for him. As I walked out of my office I caught a smidgen of what he said... "man, sometimes when she wears skirts it kills me. She has some of the nicest legs!" I bet you can imagine how that statement made this girl feel.

I'm thinking of getting a concealed weapon license.

I had a frosty today. It was really good. I wish I didn't like sugar. My life would be so much easier.

I'm In

noreply@blogger.com (Amber Shimp!) — Fri, 29 May 2009 04:13:00 +0000

I am kind of obsessed with this song by Keith Urban...

Love doesn't come with a contract
You give me this, I give you that.
It's scary business.
Your heart and soul is on the line.
Baby, why else would I be standin' 'round here
so tongue tied?

If I knew what I was doing,
I'd be doing it right now.
And I would be the best damn poet;
Silver words out of my mouth.
My words might not be magic,
But they cut straight to the truth.
So if you need a lover and a friend,
Baby, I'm in. I'm in.

Baby, come on in, the water's fine.
I'll be right here, you take your time.
Just let me hold you.
And we'll both take that leap of faith.
It's like I told you, there's no guarantees when
you feel this way.

If I knew what I was doing,
I'd be doing it right now.
And I would be the best damn poet;
Silver words out of my mouth.
My words might not be magic,
But they cut straight to the truth.
So if you need a lover and a friend,
Baby, I'm in. I'm in.
Baby,I'm in, I'm in.

Baby, come here next to me
I'll show you how good it can be
I'll breathe each breath you breathe;
I can pour out everything I am,
Everything I am.

If I knew what I was doing,
I'd be doing it right now.
And I would be the best damn poet;
Silver words out of my mouth.
My words might not be magic,
But they cut straight to the truth.
Oh, so if you need a lover and a friend,
Yeah, if you need a lover and a friend,
Ooh, baby, I'm in. I'm in.
Baby,I'm in. I'm in.

Baby, come here next to me
I'll show you how good it can be
I'll breathe each breath you breathe;
I can pour out everything I am.

Baby, come here next to me;
I'll show you how good it can be.
Baby, come here next to me;
I'll show you how good it can be.

Baby, come here. Baby, come here. Baby, come here.